Her Real View: Tips For Brain Fog {Mental Health}

It happens in old age but it can also happen because of your mental state, being too overwhelmed, burn outs and medications can cause it – brain fog or forgetfulness. You begin to do absentminded things you otherwise may have not done before like forgetting the stove on or not remembering certain events as if they’ve been erased from memory.

I started becoming more and more absent minded last year. I started to forget simple things I would otherwise remember like why I entered a room to begin with. I started to know myself and know what I will remember (like locking the door before I leave or turning off the lights) and what I may forget (that bottle of ketchup for the fourth time at the store).

With learning about the new me came doing things a little different. I use technology new and old to help me remember the important stuff and I try to meditate to exercise my brain.

Using technology like calendars, timers, alarms, voice notes and notepads make it that much easier to write things down and have them literally at your fingertips.

Wall calendar’s are nice to have and can give a better visual for important dates and schedules for the forgetful folks like us. I like to use both a paper calendar and my iPhone to keep important things in mind.

Post-it notes are a staple in my home office. I jot notes, dates, ideas, you name it and stick them around my desk. When the task is done or date has passed I simply toss them into the recycle bin. Not very eco-friendly of me but I’m old-school and that’s how we were taught. You could replace post-it’s with a dry erase board too. I just don’t have room in my little space for one.

-Telling someone. When it comes to important dates or appointments it can help to tell someone else about them. I let my partner know my schedule, he sometimes has to remind me of appointments and I also remind him of his. I even tell my mom and she reminds me. Nothing like a Mom reminder.

-Napping. Not always convenient but even a small 10 minute nap can help reboot your brain and give you a little energy in the afternoon. Too long of a nap (past 45 minutes) will definitely leave you groggy and not able to sleep that night so be cautious of what time of day to nap (1pm-4pm) and how long (10-30 mins tops). Set an alarm to wake up just in case. Either way your body and mind will thank you for taking the break.

These are just some of my own personal tips for helping your memory during a brain fog. If your memory is a serious concern it could be caused by a medical condition. Please see your doctor for proper medical advice.

Her Real View: Why Winter Sucks {when you have chronic pain} #HipDysplasia #Osteoarthritis #chronicpain #spoonie

We are smack dab in the middle of January and honestly we were spoiled and lucky in December 2019 that the real winter weather held out until now. Winter can really suck for those of us who suffer daily from chronic pain.

The weather. When it hits below freezing, ice is on the pathways and snow all over the sidewalks, I prefer to stay in. My bones ache the colder it is outside and the colder I get. If I shiver, it makes it even worse.

Uneven ground. Despite my disability I have responsibilities and one is walking my kids to the bus stop every morning. This becomes difficult in the winter. My cane has an ice pick on the end and my boots have removable cleats just in case but walking on uneven, icy ground causes pinches and pulls that are extremely painful. My body fights just to walk a small distance in the winter and by the time I return I’m exhausted.

Ice. The scariest thing about going out in winter. I have more confidence wearing my cleats and using my canes ice pick but I sometimes don’t wear the cleats and use the ice pick if I’m going somewhere in a car; slips happen and when they do my entire body pays.

Isolation/Depression. With so many things to worry about during the winter time I find myself more isolated, sometimes more depressed.

How do I get through the suckiest season with chronic pain?

Keep busy. I do as much as my body and mind will let me to keep busy if I’m stuck indoors. Hobbies, light chores or even relaxing for a day. If I’ve been isolating myself my spouse notices and he makes me go out with him. Nowhere special even if it’s just out for a coffee, he takes care of me and for that I’m grateful.

Keep active indoors. Since walking or doing anything outside aren’t good options to keep myself in shape during the winter, we invested a little in a mini home gym. An exercise bike to help stretch my hips and surrounding muscles (used $10 and it works!), 5lbs weights and a small sized medicine ball for knot stretching and such. It’s not much but it works and it helps keep me motivated with workout goals. It’s harder on my severe pain days but it’s necessary for my condition.

Dress for the weather. If I do have to go out I make sure I overdress for the weather. I don’t care who laughs at the pompon on my toque!

Be careful. When I do have to go out I’m careful. I use my cleats and ice pick if I have to go any distance beyond my driveway. I take my time when I walk the kids to their bus stop. It’s alright for now, my seven year old walks as slow as I do.

Know my limits. I’m still working on knowing my limits. Even if I keep myself locked up inside doing stuff, too much physical activity like standing, bending, stretching, walking up stairs, carrying anything heavier than my 5lbs chihuahuas etc all exhaust me quickly and the more tired I am the more sore I become. I try to tell myself “enough”.

Im sure those of you also suffering with chronic pain can relate.

Let’s try to make it to April! 😂 🧊

Her Real View: No, sorry we don’t have a Facebook page anymore and here’s why!

Today I made the decision to deactivate my personal Facebook account. Attached to this personal page were several “pages” for hobby blogs I run with my spouse. As of today, he’s in charge of two of the pages while the other two are on hiatus.

Difficult to grow unless you pay to play. Yes, it’s true. Many businesses pay for their ads to show up in your Facebook newsfeed. I’m more of an organic type of social media person. I like gaining followers and readers because they actually like me or are interested in what I have to say, not because I paid for them.

Rumours, or are they? The internet is full of stories and conspiracies about Facebook and privacy. It’s scary to think a huge company like Facebook uses little people like you and I as pawns to get richer through our information. I enjoy social media but I do like somewhat of a privacy and it’s been a bit concerning while shopping elsewhere online ads for items I purchased showed up on my Facebook newsfeed.

Too much junk! From ads to stupid videos, meme’s and more – out of all the social media platforms I find Facebook has the most junk and honestly lately I’ve been scrolling through my feed out of sheer boredom.

Creeps. The other day I woke up to over ten friend requests from random men. Most of them had middle eastern names. I didn’t know any of them or how they found me and it kind of creeped me out. I’m happy with my almost 17 year relationship and am not online to “hook up” or whatever the hell else.

People shouldn’t need Facebook to remember your birthday if you are that important to them. Just an example of how fake Facebook makes me feel the world is.

I’m not completely finished with Facebook. I mean they do run one of the biggest messenger systems on the web and it’s useful to keep in touch with real family and friends, you know, those people we actually know in real life? So, messenger stays but the personal info pages and pictures, it just might be permanently gone.

I may miss certain things like the groups I was part of but maybe not. Maybe it’s time to step away from Facebook. It never was my favourite platform to begin with. That’s just my own little opinion. What does that matter, right? It matters to me and my mental health. It matters to me what I want to expose myself to and what I don’t.

You can still find me on Twitter, and Instagram @HerRealView! Sorry, I also got rid of Snapchat – Instagram and Fb messengers have the same filters haha!

I know…Instagram is owned by Facebook. It just doesn’t feel as intrusive for some reason. 🤷🏼‍♀️

Keep it real people! 😏

It’s January 2020: What will it bring you?

Sorry for the lateness of my first post of the new decade…

Welcome to January 2020.

The holidays came and went; I felt detached, constantly thinking about something going on right after the new year celebrations. Back to real life and facing something I’ve been dreading.

I feel like I’m slipping backward again; back into the dark abyss. I don’t want to slip, I don’t want to fall. I’ve been working too hard on myself to let someone or something break me down again but reality is, it is breaking me down again.

My goal for January is to get over this hurdle that’s been causing me so much mental stress and anxiety. I can’t control the outcome. I can do my best with the best of my abilities and pray to god it pans out in my favour. I need to build myself up again but it’s so hard when everyday is a guessing game.

I know you don’t know what I’m taking about and you’re probably confused but if you can spare some positive energy, send it my way. I could use all the positivities I can get.

I’m hoping January will bring me some answers. Once I get these answers maybe then I can breathe.

What will January bring you?

Music Monday: We Wish You A Merry Christmas!

We wish you a Merry Christmas. We wish you a Merry Christmas. We wish you a Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year!

Whoever isn’t singing this song by now, what a grinch you are! Only a couple of more days until Christmas!

We’ve had a busy December; it’s going to be nice to unwind and enjoy the holidays with the kids.

Click the image below to hear the song and hope you and yours have a very merry Christmas and happy New Years celebration! See you in 2020!

Merry Christmas my Internet web friends! 🙂

It’s okay not to drink during the holidays! I don’t!

I love Christmas. I’m a parent so the holidays automatically are all about my kids and seeing the magic in their eyes. Alcohol takes that magic away.

People, I understand. Your anxious attending family events you don’t want to, you need something to get through the office party, the kids are way too sugared up and you need your pantry wine and that’s fine! I’m talking about the grown adults who overdo it and blame it on the holidays.

I witnessed enough alcohol induced events to know that’s not what I want my kids to remember. I don’t want any of their holiday memories to be of some drunken fool that can’t hold it together or worse it being one of her parents. Neither the kids father nor I drink.

I witnessed the family fights and friends needing cabs called because they couldn’t even stand up. I witnessed my moms ex boyfriend drunk driving me to my fathers house one Christmas, swerving all over the road. My teenaged heart pounding. My parents fighting on the phone. Yet still as I grew into a young adult, that was ok. I saw it growing up. It was “normal” around the holidays for adults to get plastered.

20 years ago I would have helped someone down a couple of bottles of wine and other random hard drinks at any holiday celebration. The curtain came down and I felt more at ease. Why shouldn’t I? Everyone else was half corked too and nobody would remember anything stupid I’d say.

Eventually, these holiday gatherings would turn ugly. Someone would drink a little too much, talk a little too much. Someone else would get offended, become incoherently defensive and an all out dramatic holiday war would ensue with guests leaving the party in a huff, swearing to never talk again. At the time we would be stuck waiting for a ride home just wanting to get the hell out of there.

We celebrate REAL Christmas. We have an annual, traditional Christmas Eve dinner with all the fixings. We invite extended family (if they want but it’s rare anyone bothers to join us). We provide food, beverages and gifts but we do not provide alcohol. When children are involved, alcohol shouldn’t be. Not to sound like a prude or holiday alcohol grinch but we don’t need to be drunk or tipsy to enjoy our kids.

We also don’t go to family events where we know the main course is drinking. With anxiety, the less stress I expose myself to, the happier everyone in my family is.

There’s nothing wrong with wanting a sober Christmas. There’s nothing wrong with refusing alcohol. There is however, something wrong with society making it a normal thing.

I’m proud to admit anything I do or say is all me. I can’t blame it on the a-a-a-a-a-alcohol. 😂

If you must drink this holiday season, be safe and know your limits! Call a cab, arrange to sleep over. Anything, just don’t drink and drive. 🙏🏻

Music Monday: Santa Baby by Eartha Kitt

Such a cute yet riské and kinda sexy Christmas song; Santa Baby by Eartha Kitt has to be one of the best holiday songs. I know many of today’s pop sensations like Ariana Grande and Miley Cyrus have tried on Kitt’s shoes and although they did a good job, the original is always the hit.

From office parties to home holiday preparing, you can almost always find this classic on the playlist.

Turn up the volume and hurry down the chimney, Santa Baby!

Click the image to hear the song!